Right Here, Right Now

I took a look at my past, 5 years before – University, graduation, NYSC, first Job e.t.c and I smiled. Those were beautiful moments, great times.
But did I know it then? Did I believe it then? The answer is NO!
Is that human nature? where we don’t know what we have till we loose it?
We don’t appreciate who we are and where we are until it’s gone?
That’s when I realized - I don’t want to look back again 5 years from today and realize that I had so so much and I didn’t even see it, value me or appreciate anything – who I am, where, what and why.
Today, I see clearly and there was so much more I was and didn’t know or believe, so much I could have done, could have been save for my fears, doubts, complaints and worries of the future.
And the future did happen!
How come I never looked very long at the positives and I only see them now?
I don’t want to do that to my today. I want to live life at its fullest, be myself, be happy, be grateful for everyday.
Fear only keeps you back, doubt belittles who you really are, unbelief gives you no credit for who you can be and its time I faced it head on and not from the sidelines.
I know I have changed much from who I used to be and even gotten better along the way but I can get even better.
Looking back, I see how truly lucky I was (I still am), how fortunate, how lovely, how precious I the days.
Don’t misunderstand me, I don’t regret anything because somehow I believe it’s all been a lesson in growth but I won’t let history repeat itself.
I never liked history anyway!
So what can I do to change all that, live to the fullest, be the best me today that I can be instead of waiting another 5 years to realize that today was indeed my golden moment.
Whatever it takes, I will give it to be that person who looks today as it were 10 years after and glow at the glory of it all.
That will be to me the gift of a life and I believe that I can have that.
Let today be the best day of my existence.
If everything I have ever faced was to bring me to this point, then it was worth it so I can live the rest of my life really living and not merely existing.
Right here, right now is the most precious moment of my existence and I won’t wait 5 years to see that, to accept and believe that.
I am doing it today!
There's still so much stiring in my heart begging to leap free but i lack the words to capture it completely
Hopefully I understand even if in a little way what and who I ultimately need to be and do because Right here, Right now is the best that I will ever be.
Help me God!